nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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