Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
