He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
