My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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