Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
