Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
whose parrot is this?
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
