I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I think I died a long time ago.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize