Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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