Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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