I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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