He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
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