You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
