His hands were made for my vagina.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
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