Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I am midnight drunk by noon
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
