Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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