People in love make me want to vomit
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Randomize