im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
