So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
