video games are the ultimate cock blocker
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
