She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
