Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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