ugly people sure do ruin things
i just sent this text using only my big toe
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize
