dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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