What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
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