I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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