You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
