bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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