I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
