Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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