Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
