so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Your tits are I can't wait for
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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