So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Randomize
