we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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