In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
