sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
