it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
