this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
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