so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
