That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
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