it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize
