PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Randomize