Where did you get a picture of my penis
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
