apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
third nipple confirmed
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize
