We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
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