My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Randomize
