Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
