Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
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