There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
