this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
