end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
You are the jesus of drinking
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
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